Talking with a student in distress is challenging. Use these tips to connect with and calm your student who is actively distressed during the meeting.
Actions from Post
- Bookmark the websites for Counseling and the Psychological Services Clinic. You should also be familiar with their process and location if you need to walk a student over.
- Brainstorm times you have felt in distress AND how you processed or worked through those feelings. If a student is distressed, be prepared with your examples from experience.
- Study the steps for Talking through Distress (make notecards, a jingle, or another way to help you feel confident in what to do)
Signs of Distress
While we acknowledge and value people's individual experiences, there are typical reactions to trauma that we need to know for our advising practices. If you see these signs of distress, employ the talking strategy to help students process their feelings.
Emotional:
- Express guilt, grief, and sadness
- Appear irritable as you attempt to help/talk
- Display an angry outburst to the conversation
Physical:
- Start sweating or shaking
- Mention changes in appetite or sleep habits
- Mention dizziness or chest pain (and might appear dazed)
Mental:
- Appear confused, even after several clear explanations
- Ruminate on what is or has happened, even after a “resolution” is found
Talking through Distress: Guide your advisee in processing their current emotions. Use the table below to help them recognize, process, and move forward in their situation.
The WHAT
Ask your student to name their feeling. You can use this emotion wheel to help them pick out their WHAT
The WHY
Ask your student to break down why they are feeling that way. What triggered the response and if there is a deeper reason.
The HOW
Talk with your student on how to process that feeling. It can be constructive if you show empathy here by sharing a tactic you have used when experiencing a similar what (feeling).
The Way Forward
Coach your student on their options. Often, students react to the news we share about their academic progress, plan, or classes. Show them the pros, cons, and potential outcomes for each option they have to move forward. You can also show them the websites for our campus and community support to build their confidence in access the resources.
Suggestions and Information from College Student Wellbeing, Trauma, & Resilience course, created from Florida State University Professional Development. Copyright, The Florida State University, 2021.
A past advisor with a counseling background created a video about helping a student in active distress. Watch for more tips!
